Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. Psalm 145:3, NIV.
It only took me one second to say, but as soon as the words rolled off my tongue, conviction hit my heart. I quickly shifted around in the Panera booth to get more comfortable, gripped my coffee cup and corrected myself.
"No, you know what? I'm great."
My friends looked back across the booth from me, their smiles genuine and eyes curious to know more. What had led to my 5-star life update? This was quite unusual. I smiled and began to share.
Marriage was fun, and parenting Mae had been a blast that week. I felt fortunate to have amazing friends and a wonderful church. I'd been working through my emotions and feeling a lot of deep healing and breakthrough. Sadness and anger were starting to fade. The side effects from colon cancer treatments were not bad at all.
I wasn't just good that day, I felt joyful and happy. I'd been blessed by God in so many ways - I was great!
As I got in the car to head home, I reflected on why I hesitated to share my happiness. I first realized that my fear of man wanted me to stay quiet - what if the others weren't doing great? Would my report offend them?
And then I realized my fear of recurrence - what if my health took a downward turn and I got my hopes up? I'd feel embarrassed for saying I felt so good only to feel bad again.
Yet as I drove down the highway, I realized I needed to repent. I hadn't been quick to give God glory for the blessings that led to my happiness. The roots of holding me back were control and pride.
Sometimes if we've faced suffering, we can become more comfortable talking about our darkness rather than sharing about our light. We'd rather tell someone about our lion's den or desert walks over our deliverance and victory stories.
Yet when God gives us blessings, it's to bring glory to His name. He wants us to feel happy and celebrate, we're encouraged to talk about what He's done!
Our Father in heaven loves us, and He loves it when His kids feel happy. And, our happiness is contagious! We can dramatically encourage other people's faith if we'll we share about our joy and how He's brought us out of pain and into freedom and healing.
Prayer: Father, how am I holding back when it comes to sharing about the ways you've blessed me? Help me get rid of fear and embrace the happiness that you've brought into my life.